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Listen to the Abbott and Costello Radio Program
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Abbott and Costello Facts
Abbott and Costello also known as William (Bud) Abbott and Lou
Costello who was born Louis Francis Cristillo were an early
Hollywood American comedy duo whose work in radio, film and
television made them one of the most popular comedy teams in
entertainment history. Thanks to the endurance of their very popular
routine, "Who's on First?" whose rapid-fire word play and
comprehension confusion set the preponderant framework for most of
their best-known routines.
The team from the famous joke routine is, as a result, featured in
the Baseball Hall of Fame. Bud Abbott was born in Asbury Park, NJ,
October 2, 1895 and died April 24, 1974 in Woodland Hills,
California. Lou Costello was born in Paterson, NJ, March 6, 1906 and
died March 3, 1959 in East Los Angeles, California.
In 1951, they
moved to television--first as frequent hosts of The Colgate Comedy
Hour (Eddie Cantor and Martin and Lewis were among the others). Each
show was a live hour of vaudeville in front of a theater audience,
revitalizing the comedians' performances and giving their old
routines a new sparkle.
Beginning in 1952, The Abbott and Costello Show was a filmed
half-hour series loosely adapted from their radio show, casting the
duo as unemployed wastrels. One of the show's running gags involved
Abbott perpetually nagging Costello to get a job to pay their rent,
while Abbott barely lifted a finger in that direction. The show
featured Sidney Fields as their landlord, and Hillary Brooke as a
friendly neighbor who sometimes got involved in the pair's schemes.
Another semi-regular was Joe Besser as Stinky, a 40-year-old sissy
dressed in a Little Lord Fauntleroy suit. Gordon Jones was Mike the
cop, who always lost patience with Lou. The Abbott and Costello Show
ran from 1952 to 1954, but the show found a larger viewership via
syndicated reruns from the late 1960s to the 2000's. In 2006 the
shows were released in two five-DVD sets,
The Abbott & Costello Show: 100th Anniversary Collection Season 1,
and
Abbott & Costello Show - 100th Anniversary Collection Season 2 .
In 1966 Bud voiced his character in a series of 156
five-minute Abbott and Costello cartoons made by Hanna-Barbera.
Lou's character was voiced by Stan Irwin. Costello had already
passed away by 1959.
Who's on First Routine
LOU: I love baseball. When we get to St. Louis, will you tell me the
guys' names on the team
so when I go to see them in that St. Louis ballpark I'll be able to
know those fellows?
BUD: All right. But you know, strange as it may seem, they give ball
players nowadays
very peculiar names.
LOU: Funny names?
BUD: Nicknames, pet names. Now, on the St. Louis team we have Who's
on first,
What's on second, I Don't Know is on third---
LOU: That's what I want to find out; I want you to tell me the names
of the fellows
on the St. Louis team.
BUD: I'm telling you: Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know
is on third.
LOU: You know the fellows' names?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: Well, then, who's playin' first?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: I mean the fellow's name on first base.
BUD: Who.
LOU: The fellow playin' first base for St. Louis.
BUD: Who.
LOU: The guy on first base.
BUD: Who is on first.
LOU: Well what are you askin' me for?
BUD: I'm not asking you---I'm telling you: Who is on first.
LOU: I'm asking you---who's on first?
BUD: That's the man's name!
LOU: That's who's name?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: Well go ahead and tell me.
BUD: Who.
LOU: The guy on first.
BUD: Who.
LOU: The first baseman!
BUD: Who is on first!
LOU: Have you got a first baseman on first?
BUD: Certainly!
LOU: Then who's playing first?
BUD: Absolutely!
LOU: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the
money?
BUD: Every dollar of it! And why not, the man's entitled to it.
LOU: Who is?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: So who gets it?
BUD: Why shouldn't he? Sometimes his wife comes down and collects
it.
LOU: Who's wife?
BUD: Yes. After all, the man earns it.
LOU: Who does?
BUD: Absolutely.
LOU: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guys name on first
base.
BUD: Oh, no, no, What is on second base.
LOU: I'm not asking you who's on second.
BUD: Who's on first.
LOU: That's what I'm trying to find out!
BUD: Well, don't change the players around.
LOU: I'm not changing nobody!
BUD: Now, take it easy.
LOU: What's the guy's name on first base?
BUD: What's the guy's name on second base.
LOU: I'm not askin' ya who's on second.
BUD: Who's on first.
LOU: I don't know.
BUD: He's on third. We're not talking about him.
LOU: How did I get on third base?
BUD: You mentioned his name.
LOU: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is
playing third?
BUD: No, Who's playing first.
LOU: Stay offa first, will ya?!
BUD: Well, what do you want me to do?
LOU: Now what's the guy's name on third base?
BUD: What's on second.
LOU: I'm not asking ya who's on second.
BUD: Who's on first.
LOU: I don't know.
BUD: He's on third.
LOU: There I go, back on third again.
BUD: Well, I can't change their names.
LOU: Will you please stay on third base?
BUD: Please. Now what is it you want to know?
LOU: What is the fellow's name on third base.
BUD: What is the fellow's name on second base.
LOU: I'm not askin' ya who's on second!
BUD: Who's on first.
LOU: I don't know.
BUD & LOU: Third base!
LOU: You got an outfield?
BUD: Oh, sure.
LOU: St. Louis has got a good outfield?
BUD: Oh, absolutely.
LOU: The left fielder's name?
BUD: Why.
LOU: I don't know, I just thought I'd ask you.
BUD: Well, I just thought I'd tell you.
LOU: Then tell me who's playing left field?
BUD: Who's playing first!
LOU: Stay out of the infield!
BUD: Don't mention any names out here!
LOU: I want to know what's the fellow's name in left field?
BUD: What is on second.
LOU: I'm not askin' ya who's on second!
BUD: Who is on first.
LOU: I don't know!
BUD & LOU: Third base!
BUD: Now take it easy, take it easy, man.
LOU: And the left fielder's name?
BUD: Why.
LOU: Because!
BUD: Oh, he's center field.
LOU: Wait a minute. You got a pitcher on the team?
BUD: Wouldn't this be a fine team without a pitcher.
LOU: I dunno. Tell me the pitcher's name.
BUD: Tomorrow.
LOU: You don't want to tell me today?
BUD: I'm tell you, man.
LOU: Then go ahead.
BUD: Tomorrow.
LOU: What time?
BUD: What time what?
LOU: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?!
BUD: Now listen, Who is not pitching. Who is on---
LOU: I'll break your arm if you say who's on first!
BUD: Then why come up here and ask?
LOU: I want to know what's the pitcher's name?
BUD: What's on second.
LOU: I don't know.
BUD & LOU: Third base!!
LOU: You gotta catcher?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: The catcher's name?
BUD: Today.
LOU: Today. And Tomorrow's pitching.
BUD: Now you've got it.
LOU: That's all. St. Louis has a couple of days on their team,
that's all.
BUD: Well, I can't help that. All right. What do you want me to do?
LOU: Gotta catcher?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: I'm a good catcher too you know.
BUD: I know that.
LOU: I would like to play for the St. Louis team.
BUD: Well I might arrange that.
LOU: I would like to catch. Now I'm being a good catcher, Tomorrow's
pitching on the
team, and I'm catching.
BUD: Yes.
LOU: Tomorrow throws the ball and the guy up bunts the ball---
BUD: Yes.
LOU: Now when he bunts the ball---me being a good catcher---I want
to throw the guy
out at first base, so I pick up the ball and throw it to who?
BUD: Now that's the first thing you've said right.
LOU: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!
BUD: Well, that's all you have to do.
LOU: Is to throw it to first base?
BUD: Yes.
LOU: Now who's got it?
BUD: Naturally.
LOU: Who has it?
BUD: Naturally.
LOU: Naturally.
BUD: Naturally.
LOU: O.K.
BUD: Now you've got it.
LOU: I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.
BUD: No you don't, you throw the ball to first base.
LOU: Then who gets it?
BUD: Naturally!
LOU: O.K.
BUD: All right.
LOU: I throw the ball to Naturally.
BUD: You don't! You throw it to Who!
LOU: Naturally!
BUD: Well, that's it. Say it that way.
LOU: That's what I said!
BUD: You did not.
LOU: I said I'd throw the ball to Naturally.
BUD: You don't. You throw it to Who.
LOU: Naturally.
BUD: Yes!
LOU: So I throw the ball to first base and Naturally gets it.
BUD: No! You throw the ball to first base---
LOU: Then who gets it?!
BUD: Naturally!
LOU: That's what I'm saying!
BUD: You're not saying that.
LOU: I throw the ball to Naturally!
BUD: You throw it to Who!
LOU: Naturally!
BUD: Naturally. Well, say it that way.
LOU: THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!
BUD: Now don't get excited. Now don't get excited.
LOU: I throw the ball to first base---
BUD: Then Who gets it!
LOU: HE BETTER GET IT!
BUD: All right, now don't get excited. Take it easy.
LOU: Hrmmph.
BUD: Hrmmph.
LOU: Now I throw the ball to first base, whoever it is drops the
ball, so the guy runs to second.
Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I
Don't Know.
I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow---a triple play.
BUD: Yeah. It could be.
LOU: Another guy gets up and it's a long fly ball to Because. Why? I
don't know.
He's on third, and I don't care!
BUD: What was that?
LOU: I said, I DON'T CARE!
BUD: Oh, that's our shortstop!
Abbott and Costello Wallpaper
